What am I doing up so early????
Do early birds really get the worm? And if so, what exactly is the worm and do I want it?? At 3 AM in the morning, I am not so sure that I want anything other than to be drifting back to sleep on my squishy pillow dreaming about nothing and waking up late. And yet, here I am typing away happily with so many ideas swirling around my head.

I thought about whether I should create a blog or not and if the answer was yes, what did I truly have to offer anyone? I am a single mom, divorced almost three years ago who is living with my parents with my daughter. I am constantly dealing with child support issues with my ex and I have a job that doesn't pay a ton of money. I went to sleep last night with those thoughts after a one of my best friends urged me to create a blog and share my insight....what insight was she talking about??!! And then I woke up at 2:55 AM: Ready to share with the world.

What do I possibly have to share? Darn it, a whole lot!! Being a single mom of an incredibly amazing daughter, I know about the beauty and frustrations of parenting an active and growing child. I have seen what works, what sort of works, and what clearly fails when trying to nurture and guide her toward becoming an amazing and functioning adult. Living with my parents has taught me how to walk the delicate line of carving my own personal space and having privacy while embracing a wonderfully personal relationship with them in addition to the pleasure of seeing my daughter light up when she sees her grandparents. Of course, this has also forced me to deal with those past childhood issues and caused me to learn how to be firm yet open to their contributions as well. In regard to money, aren't we always dealing with some money-related issue in one way or another? I have learned how to budget and budget well and to be ok with it since we all need to do that in order to plan for our future and the future of our kids. Sure, a huge amount of money would be great, but what is life really about? Really. Learning to appreciate the beauty of life and how to do so regardless of your income has been priceless. And now my job.... Sure, I don't make a lot, but it pays for my monthly bills and then some and I love my co-workers and my boss is one of the most inspirational people that I know. My work is valued and though it's crazy busy at times, it's offset by those moments of laughter, constant support, and continual flexibility.

Having a network of awesome friends and family speeds the renewal process along and helped to create the necessary drive to "learntofly." Whenever I needed the gentle nudge or kick in the pants, they were there and continue to be there. They have often commented on how impressed they are that I have remained strong and constantly supportive of them despite the tough times, but I have realized that you need to do so. I have a daughter that looks up to me and most of all, I woke up to the fact that developing and maintaining an inner strength and wisdom and actually acting on those things were crucial to gaining the happy life that I was craving for so long. That can and must happen no matter your situation and blaming others doesn't work. Why waste that negativity and play the victim? Stand up and blaze your own trail (while still respecting others) and share what you have learned along the way so that others can shine as well.

So, yes, I am going to share with you all and I am 100% sure that some of what I say won't be life-changing, but I am hoping it will spark some thoughts and fire within you. And who knows, maybe you'll go off and share with the rest of the world too! Wouldn't that be fantastic...

Ok, my previously clear mind is now being bombarded with those pillow thoughts again. Wisdom tells me to give into those thoughts and get some sleep. Nite all!